I feel so weak and powerless.
But, once again, I am grieving for a child that will never be.
It *must* be a silent suffering… How could I feel this sad when I have been given so much to be happy for? How dare I love my children with less than all of me…?
But, still I mourn the fact that I will never get to know a child before he is born. I will never look at a baby and see parts of me looking back. And it does hurt.