Today Might Just Be the Day...

What happens in the daily life of the family.. the drama of foster care, the adventures of parenting, & pictures to share with everyone!

Why? This one goes out to the foster parents…

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I get the struggle. I really do. I’ve been there and done that.

 

But, I’m really frustrated with the decisions that some really good foster parents I know are making. It’s such a small, silly thing, but it can put your placements at risk. We aren’t allowed to share photos of our kids with the world. It’s just the rule. It’s a rule that’s there to protect our fragile little ones. It protects them from their biological families in some ways. In other ways, it protects the biological family. And, even if it doesn’t really serve that purpose it’s still a rule. There are lots of silly rules we have to follow. But, we’re the adults. We knew the rules when we started playing the game. And if we break the rules, it’s our children that will pay the penalty. I can’t think of a more stupid reason (I’m sure that CPS has a few) to have a displacement than a foster parent sharing photos of their foster child, but I see foster parents do it all the time.

 

Please, for me, take your kiddos down from your Face Book page. And don’t show them on your blog. Keep them safe and protect them. Follow the rules for them, not for yourself.

 

And, in the long run, it will be worth the wait. I *cannot* wait for the first post that I can share my little dude with you all. He’s beautiful. And I desperately want the world to know him as my own, but he’s not yet. And there’s nothing that I would do to risk him leaving us. It’s just not worth it.

Wanna see something cool?

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I *think* I can now upload photos.

Like I said when I started this whole thing, I’m not the technical expert.

Now, if I could only magically make it so that our dude was adopted and I could share his photo. And if I could make it so that somehow I could screen each and every person who views this so that I could share photos of our new little two…. *THAT* would be some real magic. But, I guess we’ll all just have to settle.

Here are photos of my forever babies. We had a band of pirates for Halloween. And we were a sight. I swear our neighbors felt sorry for the kids. They were given loads and loads of candy. We still have several (dozen?) pounds.

I guess while I have the chance, I should post something with some substance, too.

Our family is having a rough go of it. Well, I don’t know that that is a fair statement. Actually, our little two seem to be adjusting well. They’re talking more. They’re starting to listen (sometimes). Bean is back to going potty in the toilet. And her personality has returned. But, she doesn’t have as much attention as before (that could be a good thing?). Our little guy (who really isn’t the little one anymore) is doing o.k. He actually has responded to the change very well. But, he still has some behavior issues. Sigh. And our older boys…. *OUR* boys… well, I think they’re taking it in stride.

So, I guess it should just say that I am having a rough time.

Today the little ones went to day care for the first time. I think that they enjoyed it. I know that I enjoyed not having to stress every second that they were out of my sight. But, I wasted the time. I vegged. I didn’t get done all of the things that I needed to. And now all of those things are still waiting for me. I guess shutting down in stressful situations doesn’t really work with the lifestyle that I’m embarking on.

So, I don’t know what is ahead.

I don’t know how long I will be a mother of 6.

Please, keep us in your thoughts. And if you see a mom who looks like she is having a rough patch, just smile and think of me.

Let’s do the math…

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Laundry.

There are 6 people in the family. Each of us wears 1 pair of pants, one shirt, two socks, and undies (the little ones are in diapers, but I wear bras and sometimes there’s more than one shirt involved so I figure it balances out). Then, at night, we each wear two pieces of pajamas. That’s roughly 7 items of clothing per person, per day. Add to that about 12 towels a week, 14 hand towels or dish rags a week, and 7 sets of sheets a week.

Here we go

(7 x 7) + 12 + 14 + (7 x 4)= 103

How come it feels like so much more?

Here, it equals a load a day, more if I’m ambitious. Less and I end up falling behind.

Maybe my dish math will make me feel more justified? For breakfast, 7 of us eat at home, averaging 2 dishes. Then at lunch there are 3 of us, again averaging 2 dishes, then at dinner we average 3 dishes and we all eat here (8). We have to add in approximately 2 cups per person per day–sippy cups should equal more, but my brain is fuzzy enough already. Then we have the pots and pans and cooking dishes–I’ll estimate 12 a day?

So…

(7 x 2) + 6 + (8 x 3) + 16 + 12 = 72

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is why I run my dishwasher and average of twice a day.

Well, my math lesson has shortened the silece of nap time by a few minutes. I’m off to snuggle the Bean. She is too keyed up to sleep so I should enjoy the time I get one on one with her.

And the beat goes on

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Another day nearly done. Another seven breakfasts, eight lunches, and six dinners served (Brian and I will fend for ourselves later).

Our J (the littlest guy) is finally getting used to Brian. It’s amazing watching trust slowly build. It’s sad and scary to see his fear. Is it because Brian is so tall? Does Brian look like someone who hurt him? Is he just afraid of men? I feel for Brian. He clearly loves this little guy already. Well, maybe it’s not so clear sometimes… But, Brian is such a good dad. He just wants to be a dad to this little guy, too.

We’re surviving!

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We’ve made it a week. And a day.

Go us!

How do we do this? How do other families with six children do this?

How long will it take us to adjust? Will there be a new normal? What will that normal look like?

As I said, we are surviving. We could all use a little more sleep, a few more hugs, and a couple less messes. But, we will continue to survive. And we will get better at it.

Thank you for all of your thoughts and prayers. And thank you to Renee, who was brave enough to go to Wal-Mart with us. Thank you to my loving husband who makes this possible. I am pretty sure that he wouldn’t have picked this path alone. And thank you to Jessie for being there for the kids and for me.

What a crazy, strange journey we’re on.

Must.Blog.

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If I don’t post, I’m sure I won’t remember a thing.

We’ve added two new children to our crew. We are now at max capacity!

We now have a second daughter. She’s just a couple months younger than the Bean. But, she’s a little delayed in a few areas. So, Bean feels that she is the “big” sister and we’re encouraging that so she won’t get lost in the shuffle.

The new little girl has a head of curly brown hair and an infectious smile.

She brought along her younger brother. He is a year and a half and more than a handful! He’s all over the place. And he’s totally silent, so if you didn’t see him leave, it’s really hard to find him again.

We’ve already had a couple bumps in the road… The timing wasn’t great as Brian is away for the weekend. And today our sitter discovered some little creepy, crawlies in the hair. So, we’ve done a lice treatment already. And today at the pediatrician our new girl was diagnosed with a staph infection.

We’ve also already had some nice surprises, too. Our sitter and one of our neighbors have brought over clothes for the little guy. And, thankfully, she can wear Bean’s clothes and I even had some shoes that were too small on Bean that fit the little girl perfectly!

I will try to post more soon.

 

For now I *must* sleep.

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The phone has started to ring again.
Ready or not, here comes the next little one.
Hopefully, it will be after our next trip is done. I don’t think that we need to add any extra stress right now.
The Bean got sick this morning. So far, it looks like a fluke thing. But, she hasn’t eaten anything this morning either. I figure if she’s not hungry, I’m not going to push it. One of the things that’s amazing about her is that she knows in advance when she’s not feeling well. Every time she gets a bug, she’ll stop eating a day or so before.

https://www.momtomany.net/70/

World’s Worst Blogger

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And the title goes to… Me!

I went on vacation without a camera! And, even though I had my computer, and tons of ideas, I didn’t blog once.

But, I am back now and life is back to “normal” so let the blogging commence!

The only thing that I can think about is the call that we got today. We were called about a little guy who’d suffered physical abuse. He has a fractured skull.

He’s not here with us. So, I’m sure that he found a safe home.

It’s just hard to get him off my mind. I can’t imagine what must happen in a family to have such a horrible thing happen to a baby. I don’t want to think about how he must feel.

Please send a thought or prayer or whatever you believe in out to this little guy. Hopefully he will be able to heal physically and emotionally from what he’s already been through so early on in his life.