Today Might Just Be the Day...

What happens in the daily life of the family.. the drama of foster care, the adventures of parenting, & pictures to share with everyone!

Gotcha!

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So, I know, I *told* you that it’d be awhile because we were moving. And I lied. It has been awhile, but we’re still in the same house. Boxes are piling up around me, but no move has happened. In our new economy, things just don’t go the same way that they used to in the house-buying arena. So, the close of our new home has been delayed.. I hope (well, I know it’s been delayed, I just *hope* it’ll still go through).

Anyhow, it will be o.k. This gives us more time to pack up all of our stuff. Have I mentioned how much stuff we have? We have a lot of stuff! I’ve been plugging right along packing a box or two a day.

In the meantime, we have had a little more excitement. Our little Princess is now 4!

Her birthday was on Sunday, but we just keep the party rolling… We celebrated on Saturday by going to go see Yo Gabba Gabba!

Bean with the Gabba Gang

 Bean Enthralled by the Show

Before Going with Bean in her Mommy-made Foofa Shirt

Then on Sunday we celebrated with cupcakes (Bean is still waiting on a *real* cake.. she might be waiting for awhile) and her Aunt Brandy…

Lots of Helpers

Which brings us to today. Today is another special day. Birth parents get to have the whole 9 months to prepare. They can have a pregnancy journal and a shower and all that sort of stuff. Adoptive parents get a “Gotcha” day! It’s a little controversial in some adoption circles, but for us, with our long waits and uncertain future as foster parents, we choose to celebrate. Today is the day that our little girl came to our home. I believe that I shared the story last year, so I won’t bore you, but it’s pretty cool how quickly she became our daughter. Happy Gotcha Day, Miss Bean! We love you!

Treats for You!

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Wanted to share our little cuties with you all!

I do have to boast on myself a little bit. On Halloween, I think I earned my MOTY (Mom of the Year) Award… I took all four out to trick or treat around our block. Then, I took just D & d out to hit the next couple blocks. Oh, and I made Bean’s costume myself!

Not only did I give them extra trick or treat time, I also (for the first time ever) took them to the gas station for a toilet break mid-TOT so the fun could continue.

*Then* when we’d treated as much as we could and we were all out of tricks, my little guy (well, the littlest of my bigs) was exhausted. We were about half a block from home when he was very tired. So, I carried him the rest of the way home…

And I begged him to remember this. There will be plenty of times of Mom throwing a fit or getting mad for him to keep in his memory bank. I hope that this will replace one of those!

Leaping without Looking

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Wow.

I feel like there’s so much going on right this very second in our home & family.

Today we had another Halloween party to attend…. this one was at the Senior Center. It was very cute. My little ones went trick-or-treating from table to table. I love the fact that my kids went right up to everyone and gave high fives and hugs and even sat on a couple laps. Oh, and I’ve already been able to raid their candy.

Wednesday was the first Halloween celebration at our elementary school. And the highlight of that evening was the principal kissing a pig. If any other parents are looking for a fund raiser that the kids will get behind, you’ve found it! The principal set a goal of $300 and the kids raised $500! It was all for charity, but I’m sure it could be used to fund something needed at a school as well.

Oh, I totally forgot. Last weekend the kids went to Boo at the Zoo.

So, this whole holiday thing has been going for days and while the end *is* in sight, we still have a few more days.

But, that’s just one stinking holiday.

B is also gearing up for a huge event for his station. They host an annual show that brings together financial professionals and locals.. and they will be broadcasting live from the event.

So,  I plan on seeing very little of him next week.

Add to that the fact that I’m back to “work” again. Yesterday was my third class of this cycle. And while I only work a few hours each week, it definitely makes a difference being away from home even one night.

OK, once we survive B’s event, then we will be mere days away from my first show!!!

Lately every spare minute I have I’m either thinking about the business or crafts or creating or fixing things. My goal is to finish one item a day, but yesterday I didn’t meet that, so that means that today I need to get the lead out.

I’m sure it will be a huge success.. (I really, really, really, really hope it is!).

The weekend after that (11/20ish for those of you counting), we thankfully only have a couple events…

Then there’s Turkey Day.

I will be making pizza. You are all invited over. Just bring a side dish!

And the next day is one of my favorite days of the year–black Friday. I think I’ll do a whole post on that soon.

Then comes RAD Crafts second show!

And here’s the heavy one. That next week we may be closing on a new house.

Egads.

It’s still up in the air. We are more than a couple steps away from it being a done deal, but it’s there.

As if that weren’t enough, we will also be taking our little Bean that weekend to go see Yo! Gabba Gabba! for her 4th birthday…

Maybe this is my “look”. I at least have an outline. None of it seems impossible. And, really, it’s just one big event per week. We can do that. Right?

Of Course!

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So, I don’t know about your state, but mine is broke. And, assuming you’re from the States, your country is broke, too.

I’m sure you hear about it. You might even be  feeling the pinch of your own financial struggles. I know that the economy has been rough on all areas.

But, what’s it really costing?

An article was posted on a fostering board that I frequent (http://www.google.com/hostednews/ap/article/ALeqM5gq1yhAPK8txoVpGAPujSMUK9wz5gD9HULPCG4)

Turns out that the number of kids in care has gone down.

The interesting thing to me was that virtually all of the people who read the article on that board had the same view. It’s easy to assume that the number of kids in care has gone down because we’re educating parents more. Or, you can look at the aid that’s given to families in need–maybe that’s alleviating some of the pressure and preventing abuse and neglect.

But, those of us in the thick of things have a different thought. Maybe it’s because there aren’t enough people to investigate… Maybe there’s fiscal pressure from above to leave children in their homes (not in all cases, but in those borderline cases..).

The truth is that we don’t know.

And we won’t for a long time.

My guess is that as the economy changes, there will be more changes in policy and more cut backs. And there will be fewer and fewer children in foster care. There will be fewer caseworkers to investigate and less funds for preventative measures.

Then, there will be a tragedy or two or three or one hundred. And all of a sudden, people will wake up. They’ll demand to know why children were left so long in unsafe conditions. There will be a public outcry. And then the funding will return.

The real question, in my mind, is how many children will be sacrificed? How much do we need to see and know before we want action?

And, more importantly, what can we do now to stop this?

I think that it starts at home. Do you know your neighbors? Are there any that need help now? What about at your work place… is there a family in need? Do you interact with children? Have you seen the signs of abuse? If you have, what are you doing to help? What about your family, do you have someone close to you who’s an addict? Are there kids involved that you can step in and help?

I think the best thing about this economy is that as a whole, we’ve been force to reevaluate. We’ve started looking differently at debt and value and expenses.

Let’s move some of that focus to our neighborhood and the children and people around us. We can make a difference.

New Family Members

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So, no new kids! No need to freak out!

But, we do have some new pets.

We added three small frogs a couple weeks ago. Then came a snail. And tonight came three more snails. As any parent knows, picking a name is an important job. We gave this job to the kids. So, here are the names…

  • Froggy
  • Ricky
  • Joseph
  • Snaily
  • Gary
  • Pinky
  • Jack

Obviously, some of my kids are more creative than others…

Sh*t My Kid Says

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Hmmm…

I don’t know if my parents will get that reference in the title or not, but I think the book is one of the top sellers right now (http://www.amazon.com/Sh-t-My-Dad-Says/dp/0061992704/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1283377130&sr=8-1).

Anyhow, there have been things that the kids have done and said in the past that still make me smile. D used to call McDonald’s “to McDonald’s”, d was just commenting this morning how he used to call burgers boogers and ask to go eat at “Booger King”. Hamburgers were hungaburgers for a long time. Oh, and for whatever reason (Brian and I never figured this one out) hand weights or bar bells were always called “hangs”. And don’t let me forget, hangers were called hookers (heck, since I’m going there with the title, I might as well let the whole post be a little adult).

Now V has reached the age where he talks non-stop. Literally, there are times when he only pauses to take breaths and I don’t think he cares if anyone else is listening, he just goes on and on and on. His favorite things to talk about are cars, trucks, trains, monster trucks, monsters, zombies, cartoons, movies, food… In all of this talking there are a few words that he’s invented or started using. And I really had to write a couple of them down so I don’t forget. Oh, and I thought it’d be fun to see if anyone can translate.

So, here is a short list of “V” words:

  1. Tavel
  2. Curve (yes, I know what a curve is, but do you know what V means when he says it?)
  3. Alsalee
  4. Maleg

Any guesses??

The Good, The Bad, The Gross

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O.K. First, no news.

Alrighty, then!

This weekend we were busy. We had an event on Saturday and a party on Sunday. One event a day is plenty for us!

Saturday was the annual spring event for our foster care agency (tocallhome.com).  There was hat making, a cake walk, Ronald McDonald came to do a magic show… And then, the wave pool. At the *very * last minute Brian got invited to go see Conan O’Brien in Vegas so he left about halfway through. My plan was to stay at the pool for as long as I could handle all four kids. I have to say that they were so well behaved! They listened to me, they stuck together. They were being kind to each other. I am so proud! It was so nice being able to actually enjoy their company rather than fighting them to just behave enough to not drive me mad. I feel like they’re getting older and it’s a good thing.

Then came Sunday.

Or, maybe I should back up to Saturday night? Yep, better start there. So, the children wouldn’t settle down. It was frustrating because they were all exhausted from the long afternoon. There were no naps and they were very clearly ready for bed. Bean ended up sleeping with me (my bad). And the boys just kept chatting and playing. I had to go in and settle them down about 5 times. Once they were finally settled, I headed to bed early. But, sleep was not meant to be. Bean kept kicking me and playing with my hair.. and she loves to be right next to whomever she’s sleeping with.. I do *not* like anyone right next to me when I’m sleeping. Then, right around 2:30 David came into the room and turned the lights on.. I woke up to him very close to my head in tears. He’d lost a tooth and was very freaked out about it. I did manage to get him calmed very quickly and Bean didn’t even notice.

But, I was awake at that point and I had a hard time calming myself back down.

I have to say that there is a huge difference between 8 hours of sleep and 8 hours of uninterrupted sleep. I get enough sleep, but it doesn’t give me the same energy when it’s broken up like it often is. What year will I get to sleep again?

So, I guess that after that I was a little grouchy on Sunday. And so were my kids. Nothing was done without a battle. Messes were made with nobody willing to pick them up. Attitudes were flaring.

We had a birthday party to go to and they did do surprisingly well there, but the ride over was a mess. And on the ride home I have to say that I was just steamed. They’d been given treat upon treat this weekend and they were complaining that I wouldn’t let them eat all of the candy in their goodie bags. Really?? Who raised them like this?

I guess this post is turning into a bit of a rant.

So, with that I’ll go onto the gross. Why didn’t anyone tell me that kids were/are so disgusting? Really!?

There are hand prints on just about every surface in my home. There’s toothpaste in the sink on a daily basis. I can’t keep up with it. I hate the fact that my home looks like this. Help!

Today while the kids were gone I got a chance to mop the kitchen and I got a few loads of laundry done. I feel like progress has been made. Brian was a gem and did the dishes for me last night as well as doing some general clean up around the house. So, I guess I’m on my way to minimizing the gross.

Now I just need to keep learning the skills of my trade & hopefully at some point we can minimize both the bad and the gross.

Here’s to more good!

Some things are worth sharing…

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This was on a message board that I frequent this morning and I really liked it…

Hanna, my seven year old from China, was in the tub. I was helping her rinse the shampoo out of her hair when she asked,  

 

“Am I a little bit Irish?”

My mind swept over some of our recent conversations about our family heritage, and I answered, “Well, ethnically you are Chinese. But since I’m a little bit Irish, then culturally, you are a little bit Irish, too.”

“When did it happen?” Hanna wanted to know.

“When did WHAT happen?” I asked, concentrating on her soapy head.

“When did I become a little bit Irish,” she explained patiently. “Was it when you kissed me for the very first time?”

I paused, shower wand in hand, and watched my daughter squeeze water out of her hair. I thought about the tiny, bundled baby that had been handed to me at the Anhui Hotel seven years earlier, and I remembered how her head felt against my cheek. I hadn’t wanted to scare her; my baby-kiss was soft and swift as I cradled her upon my shoulder. Unremarkable, it was the first kiss of many thousands, yet now, through Hanna, I see it with fairytale eyes:

My first kiss to my adopted daughter infused her with my love, my world, and the generations of my unknown ancestors! Like Sleeping Beauty wakening with a kiss from her Prince, the mother-daughter kiss called forth a magical intermingling– a covenant leaping past genetics, it bestowed Hanna and me upon each other…

My pragmatic daughter had chosen to make sense of the vast, familial complexities of international adoption with a powerfully simple symbol of promise and connection.

“Yes” I said finally. “I think that’s when it happened.”

We were SWAK.

~ Jean MacLeod

Copyright 2006, MacLeod, All Rights Reserved

Now the fun starts!

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The attorney said the end of May for little dude’s adoption!! Time to start planning the party and making the announcements!

Any inspirational ideas?

Dan’s party is today and I still haven’t finished the blog post that I started for it two weeks ago. Next week is Spring Break for the kids so I don’t foresee any extra time in my future.